"Can I be your friend?" Come on, can I have better pick-up lines than this?!?

As I am on the topic abt friends and such, it struck me that local men are such lame and uncreative creatures!

I was at Bar None yesterday with my overseas friends (See previous post). It was a very nice and happening pub and they were having a Hawaiian night... Well, a guy who was beside me suddenly ask me "Wha..at's your name? Can I at least know your name?" Thinking that he was probably drunk, I told him my name. No big deal, given his drunken state, he's probably going to forget my name in the next moment...

True enough, after a while, he came up to me and asked me "Can I be your friend?" Looking at him in mockery, I said "ok". No big deal, he's gonna forget everything in the next moment...

Then after a while, another guy came to me and asked me the same 2 questions!! What the fu*k! Is it some kind of standard Q&A thingy?

Then after a while, a lady came and begged me to go and meet her 2 friends whom, according to her, were madly in love with me and truly want to be my friends. (What the hell is going on?? Do I look so "friendless" that every guy wants to pity me and "be my friend"??)

Anyway, I could not let a lady down.. So I made a "no choice" expression at Pierre, and left with the lady to meet her 2 friends...

Then... do you want to make a guess??........

Yes, you are right! These 2 guys asked me the same questions AGAIN!
"Can I be your friend?", "What's your name?", "Can I know your name?"

Dejavu.... Anyway, let's put it that our school syllabus did not include a subject called "Pick-up a good line".... Well, maybe we should have one short-term course on this topic, to be attended by all guys reaching the age of 18 yrs-old.. Hahahah....

Since I am at this topic of pick-up lines, and I am actually quite free now, let's explore some pick-up lines that I had encountered throughout my little few years here in Singapore... Starting with the most uncreative, most boring but mostly used pick-up lines...

Pick-up Line 1. "Can I be your friend?"
Comments: Dear stranger, do I look like a girl who is here to make friends? Or do I look like am dying to have friends? And maybe I look like those lonely, miserable sort that need to be brightened up by your kind gesture to be MY friend?? Don't bother, stranger, I have enough friends to last me a few lifetimes. So pls fu*k off, thank you.


Pick-up Line 2. "You look familiar. Have I seen you before somewhere?"
Comments: Dear STRANGER, obviously you are a stranger to me. And if we really met before and you don't even remember my name, then why should I remember yours? Even if I tell you my name now, I think you will still ask me the same qn the next time we met... So, pls... thanks.


Pick-up Line 3. "Hey, didn't know you were here! How's your day? I lost your number, can I have it again?"
Comments: Well, stranger, nice try. But obviously I don't know you and don't you pretend to know me, cos I REALLY DON'T KNOW YOU and I REALLY DON'T GIVE A DAMN.. Thanks. Next pls...


Pick-up Line 4. "Hi, gorgeous, can I buy you drink?"
Comments: Thanks, I am gorgeous, I know. Anyway, I think I can afford to buy myself a drink. I hope I don't look so thirsty that you need to buy me a drink to end my suffering...


Pick-up Line 5. "I have looked around and you are the most stunning woman here."
Comments: Thanks for the compliment... So? What do you want me to say? "Sorry that I look too stunning?" or "You want to earn a free drink, is it?"


Scenerio for pick-up line 6
I was talking on my mobile-phone and was about to cross the street when a guy came up to me from behind and hold my arms. Stunned, I let him lead me across the street, while I quickly end my mobile-phone conversation. After I reached the other side of the street, I stared at him in question. And he said: ...

Pick-up Line 6: "Pretty lady, do you know it is very dangerous to cross the road while on the mobile-phone? You could have got yourself hurt and that would hurt me too because I am already attracted to you. I can't bear to see you get hurt.. Where are you heading to? I can give you a lift."
Comments: Well, quite innovative... But a bit too abrupt.. I am touched by your kind gesture, but thanks stranger, I am no 16 yrs-old schoolgirl that could be taken in by just some sweet words and bold actions. Nice try. But thank you, pls try again next time!


Scenerio for pick-up line 7
I was in the lift, on my way downstairs to buy lunch. The lift stopped at the next floor and 2 men came in. Suddenly, one of them started to talk to his mobile-phone and we had to hold the lift so that his line would not be cut-off. He made apology-gesture to me and as I was not rushing for time, might as well let this poor guy finish his talk, maybe this was some urgent call? Finally, he put down his mobile-phone and we reached the ground-floor. And then, at this moment, he said...

Pick-up Line 7: "Miss, actually just now I am not really having a phone-call. It's just that by doing so, I can take the chance to spend more time with you and to look at you for a bit longer.. You really caught my eye and would you like to have coffee with me?"
Comments: Well done, you caught me by surprise! That's a very innovative move, and require very quick-wit at that moment to think of such act! Hmm... but then, I prefer to just buy my lunch and thanks for your compliments. I have heard enough of such compliments and would prefer you say something different.. See you!!



Anyway anyway anyway... I hope those girl out there reading this would share some thoughts with me... Let it be known that all the above pick-up lines are disastrous..To all those guys out there, pls refrain from using any of those stated.. the success rate is practically lesser than 10%.